Running the Borders
What’s a country’s favorite exercise? Running the borders.
🌍 Geography Jokes
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🌍 Geography Jokes
Geography jokes are fun because they turn places, countries, maps, and landmarks into something playful instead of serious. They work especially well when you want jokes with a wider theme but still easy punchlines.
Think of this page as a light detour through cities, continents, and map-based nonsense.
Friendly Ocean
Why is the ocean always friendly? Because it waves hello.
🌍 Geography Jokes
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Continents Never Lost
Why don’t continents ever get lost? Because they have a lot of latitude.
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Mountains Have Opinions
Why don’t mountains ever argue? They always keep their peaks!
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Map Lost
I asked my map for directions and it said, "I’m lost too!"
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River Sense
Why do rivers never get lost? They always follow the current!
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Can February March?
Can February march? No, but April may.
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A Guard in a Russian Jail
A guard in a Russian jail goes to the library and sees an old Jewish political prisoner reading a book.
"What are you reading, old man?" asks the guard.
"I'm learning Hebrew," says the old man.
"Why bother?" asks the guard. "You'll never get to Israel. You will die here."
"I'm learning Hebrew so when I go to heaven so I can speak with Moses and Abraham," replies the old man.
"How do you know you're going to heaven? What happens if you go to hell?" asks the guard.
And the old man says, "No problem. I already speak Russian."
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Euro-English Plan
The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility.
As part of the negotiations, the British Government conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5- year phase-in plan that would become known as "Euro-English".
In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.
There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter.
In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible.
Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling.
Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away.
By the 4th yer peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v".
During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou" and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.
Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi TU understand ech oza. Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.
Und efter ze fifz yer, ve vil al be speking German like zey vunted in ze forst plas.
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